How To Get Those Important Things Done.

Have you ever found yourself wanting to get something done, yet struggling to actually do it?

For most of us, this happens all the time. Whether it is something you want to do for your business, your health or career, our best intentions can often be torpedoed by conflicting thoughts and feelings.

For example, I have had the intention of writing this article for about 3 weeks now. Even though I have had ample time, until today it has simply not happened. I would block out time on my calendar to write, but when the time came, I would ignore it or otherwise get distracted. So, I would look out a week, and block out more time to “finish the article!!!” and sure enough as the next date rolled around, I would lose my commitment.

If you have a few things in your life you truly want to accomplish, but are struggling to move ahead with, here is a simple technique to try.

This approach is most powerful when you do it with a partner, where someone can act as your coach and pick up on any signs of resistance. However, in a pinch you can try it out yourself as follows:

Step 1) Stand up (in front of a mirror if you can), and state your intention. “I want to complete my article today.”
Step 2) Scan your mind and body for any sign of resistance or conflict. In this example I might notice a conflicting thought that “I don’t know if the topics will be of interest to all my readers.”
Step 3) Give voice to, or otherwise express or act out, your conflicting thought. In this example I might repeat the conflicting thought , “I don’t know if the topics will be of interest to all my readers” in a weak, whiny voice (it is important to act out or exaggerate the silliness of the conflicts) for about 15 seconds or until you feel it has been fully expressed and effectively removed. (In my case I know it is impossible to write something that will be a hit with everyone. Yet to wait for perfection is to stay on the sidelines, and thus not be of use to anyone. )
Step 4) Now that you have cleared one conflict, speak your intention again and see if you can pick up any other conflicting feeling or thought. If anything comes up go through the steps again.

Keep doing this until you can state your intention with a solid voice and a strongly felt sense of commitment. Make sure to eliminate any feelings of resistance, and pay careful attention to notice any body language (like head nods, slouches, eye blinks, etc.) that show up in the mirror and might indicate other conflicts to explore.

Once you have your strong commitment, act as soon as possible. We have a limited reservoir of attention each day. Anything (morning paper, email, phone calls, etc,) you let come between you and your principal commitment, robs you of the energy you need to get the important thing done.

Try it. This approach will serve you well for many everyday commitments. However, if you run up against some really stubborn conflicts, seek some help. We are all highly resistant to the changes we would most benefit from making. And it is hard to spot and work through the big ones on our own.

Why Remain Optimistic?

In the trough of a deep recession, optimism can be a scarce commodity. As wave after wave of negative economic news washes around the globe, anyone who struggles to find silver linings can feel like an endangered species.

However as someone who does believe in humanity's ability to adjust and adapt to new circumstances, I was bouyed to read Dr. Sonja Lyubormirsky's THE HOW OF HAPPINESS, and find more hard evidence on the benefits of remaining optimistic.

To be clear, when I talk about optimism I am not advocating ignoring the real challenges of life. As you look around the world these days, you can see ample evidence of humanity's seemingly limitless capacity for self-interest, greed and general stupidity.

Nevertheless, if you look for it, you can also see countless situations where the best in humanity comes forth in beautiful displays of compassion, creativity and selflessness. Both these truths exist, and the point is it matters which perspective you choose to focus on or put in the forefront of your experience of life.

There is overwhelming evidence that people who choose to cultivate the habits of optimism, that believe in silver linings and that things will work out in the end, enjoy; greater health, greater longevity, lower stress, more energy and higher achievement. As an optimist you will not only enjoy far more happiness, but are also far more likely to persevere, stick to your goals and respond better to challenging situations.

Cultivating optimism is not only worthwhile, it's achievable, even for those of us raised in fearful or skeptical environments. Research attests to benefits of optimism fostering strategies ranging from; expressing gratitude, regular exercise, practicing kindness, developing greater mindfulness, cultivating social relationships, and learning how to savor more of life's simple joys. (Sonja's book is a very good summary of these strategies and includes practical advice on implementation.)

Not only can the habit of optimism make you feel better, it can also influence what you manifest or make happen in your life. In this regard, psychologists have long distinguished between primary and secondary control. An example of primary control is your ability to directly influence existing realities - the rain, the economy, your boss, etc. Secondary control refers to your ability to adapt to reality. (I cannot change the rain, maybe I can learn how to have more fun on rainy days?)

While most of the social science research focuses on helping us cultivate greater secondary control and thus better respond to life, the spiritual traditions (and Keynesian economics) teach that what you think, believe, and act on, absolutely influences your primary reality. If you think it is a dog-eat-dog world out there, you are going to be fearful and that will influence your behavior and what and whom you attract into your life. (Pessimists tend to attract more pessimists. Optimists attract people of a similar energy.) If you think the economy is going to get worse, you will hold back on your spending, and your spending is someone else's salary. They pull back on their spending and that can affect your income. In short, you create the very future you fear.

How you see the world can definitely influence, what you think, how you feel and what you act on. As such, your view of the world can directly shape the future you are creating.

So, cultivating more optimism not only makes you happier, healthier and a heck of a lot more fun to be around, it will also have a positive impact on creating a better future for everyone.

Every roller coaster ride has its share of heart stopping plunges. Choose to have faith your little cart is firmly fixed on the track it is meant to ride. On the roller coaster of life you might occasionally lose your favorite hat and possibly your breakfast, but that is all part of the journey.

Lighten up. It's not personal. Take some time today to enjoy the spectacular view and count your blessings. It will all work out in the end.